So while in Austin last week I started to finally process the numbers and they didn’t make any sense. Through the grapevine we’ve heard there are currently 90 dossiers in Rwanda waiting to be processed (this information was not from AWAA). We, sadly, are still waiting on our I-171H form until we can complete our dossier, so we’re not even in that numbered line yet! Historically we've seen that 17 adoptions were completed in 2008, 16 in 2009, and only six thus far in 2010. Given the large number already waiting ahead of us would suggest a much longer time frame than we're being advised which is now nine to eleven months. That lead time is from the DTR (Dossier to Rwanda) until our Referral (which is when they email you with an assigned child). I heard this new lead time for the first time yesterday because I missed the last conference call when they announced it. Before yesterday I was thinking the lead time was six to nine months and when we started the program we thought it was four to six months.
Up until this point I wanted to believe and trust AWAA that their prediction was accurate. I wanted to believe that the numbers I was putting together weren’t right and that AWAA knew something that I didn’t. So when I heard this new time frame yesterday I didn’t like what I was being told. Now, I had double bad news- I had to wait a long time (the agencies prediction) or possibly even a longer time (my prediction based on numbers). Yesterday I was reminded by the agency that we’ve been told from the beginning of the process that these are only predictions and with international adoption, and also with being a new program, there will undoubtedly be bumps along the way, delays, and frustrations.
I want to have accurate expectations of the process and trust God fully, but yesterday I hit a wall and felt so frustrated and depressed. I’m disappointed- and there is no denying that! I just had to let myself grieve yesterday. There is nothing I can do at this point except to seek and trust Christ, but I’m going to need his help.
8 comments:
I totally get what you're saying. We heard essentially the same info from our agency this week. We have been thinking it for a while, but hearing it from the agency made things a lot more real for some reason. Here's hoping CIS will clear us soon and that things will speed up in Rwanda dramatically...
Hey guys,
We are in this with you. Let yourself grieve- He will meet you there in the grief. We testify about our God that He is able to carry and sustain you in the wait and in the process to teach you things about Himself that will take your breath away. He is good and does good. Praying for you guys, especially that you will get your I-171H quickly.
Chase and Laura
Totally understand!!! We are almost DTR and those numbers just overwhelm me. We thought 3 or 4 months when we started the process too. We are adopting an infant girl, so the wait will probably be agonizingly long. I keep putting it positively that a) it means lots of children will be finding homes and b) I will get to spend more time with my two young bio kids and they will be that bit older by the time baby comes. There is nothing we can do but wait:) Although----apparently they have hired someone new at the Ministry to deal with applications, so they may be dealing with them at a faster rate than previously. Just think of these poor families who have been waiting YEARS for other countries. My heart goes out to them.
PS- I heard the number was '50' at the moment- so who knows what is truth and what isn't!!! Don't get disheartened:)
Oh sweet friends. I am so sorry. This is an incredible post, so very honest. Thank you for sharing your hearts and your grief...it helps to know that others are right there with you. You hate for other families to be in the same place, but to know you're not alone soothes the soul. So proud of you for your faith. Wish you were closer and could come to our Monday night coffee. Its good to be amongst other moms in waiting. Sending our love and prayers.
Oh and, I saw the last post when you spoke of judgement on those who choose to chase biological children vs adoption. I am right there with you. It's embarrassing and I just have to give my thoughts to Jesus when it happens, but thanks again for your honesty.
Oh, Tara, I completely understand how you're feeling, and every day I struggle with how to look at this delay. Some moments are easier than others, but frustration and discouragement are always close under the surface, if not saturating every thought in my head. This is a powerful opportunity to trust God in a way we never have before, and I believe He's asking us to persevere so that we might become mature and strong in our faith. Holding to that hope is where I've found the most consistent comfort, though it's comfort mixed with sadness, if that makes sense. Please know you are included in my prayers for all of us in this wait. It's excruciating, but so very important. No time is wasted time in a world where God is sovereign.
Tara,
We too are waiting for our I171H and we too are greiving the longer (and longer and longer) wait times. Urgh! Apparently we need to be sanctified! :)
Tara,
We just submitted our I-600A yesterday and are thus a couple months behind you guys in the process. I too am amazed and confused by the increased wait time. Fortunately, I have been so engrossed in the paper chase that I haven't been focusing on much else. The Lord is capable of anything and His timing is perfect. We need to keep reminding ourselves that He loves these children even more than us and will have His loving hand on them. I will be praying for you and the other waiting families for our comfort in Him in this trying time and hopefully a quick, amazing display of His greatness. With all this being said, my heart aches for you a little more because I know how anxious us moms can be waiting for our first child. Hang in there and know The Lord will carry you through ;)
Anna Baker
flbakerbloggers.blogspot.com
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