Through this trial, God is good!

I don’t know that I’ve ever wanted something so badly.  I want more than anything to meet our child and take them home.  I’m trying to surrender my plans daily to God because I want to trust in His timing and in His direction for building our family.   

I read in my morning’s devotional: 

“Sometimes it is hard to accept that God can bring about His purposes through our trials. It is hard to see past our circumstances to a future that, for us, doesn’t exist yet. But God is not constrained by time. He is not reined in by our circumstances. Because of this, we have to trust that our limited perspective simply can not process His higher purpose….’Praise the Lord, my soul, and forget not all the benefits’ (Psalms 103:2a).” 

I have to remind myself not to forget what the Lord has already done in my life (and even through this wait), and therefore I can trust in him for the future.  The truth is that He is faithful and good no matter my circumstances!   

The Healey/Walthall/Kohlbacher Clan in Edmond

Visiting Marc, Kayan, Adalae and Roman in Austin

  

God's Peace

Last week we traveled to Houston to visit Kendall and Kyle (Isaac's cousin) as well as Mammy and Pappy (Isaac's grandparents).  We had a fabulous time eating fabulous food, drinking great wine, getting spoiled at the mall, and just all-around great fellowship.  When we returned from the weekend we attended the SMU Christmas lighting with our community group, which was really festive and fun.  Overall it was a picture perfect weekend!  

Yesterday I had two things that really lifted my spirits.  In the morning I met with Chelsea Jacobs, who is also in the adoption line with us, for coffee.  I can not describe how therapeutic it is to meet with adoption couples who are also in the wait for a Rwandan baby.  We share some similar heartaches, prayers, desires, frustrations, etc.  Then, in the evening we chatted on Skype with Marc Simpao and their precious little boy Roman from Rwanda who they just adopted a few weeks ago.  We love their family and we're excited to go visit them around Christmas.  

Last night my dad encouraged me with this verse of God's promise:

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God.  And the peace of God which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus." ~Philippians 4:6-7

I'm so tired of being sensitive, hurt, angry, jealous and anxious- all of which do not come from the Lord (not to mention distracting and exhausting).  I've been at a spot where I started to get tired of praying- mostly out of disappointment.  I felt like God knew my heart and how much I wanted a child, but this verse really encouraged me.  So now as I'm praying for our child to come soon, I'm also praying for God's peace.  I'm back to trusting in God's plan and not my own.  I'm sure this will waver in time but it's nice for the moment to feel God's peace.  

(Tomorrow we'll have been DTR for 3 months.  Not that it matters since we don't have an estimation of the time line... just saying.  And I'll also say that it feels like a lot longer than 3 months!)

   

Thanksgiving Weekend

We had a great Thanksgiving weekend with Caitlin, Erica and Chase!  Ever since my parents have lived overseas we've made it a new tradition to run the Turkey Trot and then eat lunch at Luby's with the blue hairs.  Over the long weekend we participated in Black Friday shopping, went to see the movie "Morning Glory", cooked, and rested. 

Before the Turkey Trot

A cold and cloudy race day in Dallas

Running the race

Feelin' good after the race

Lunch at Luby's

Chase and Riese relaxing

The resting part of the holiday was great, but on the flip side, it puts my sadness of our adoption timeline to the forefront of my thoughts.   

On January 1st we'll have been in the adoption process for 1 year!  When we began the process we thought that maybe at most it would take a year and a half total, but here we are today knowing that they will have processed only 20 adoptions total in 2010.  If we do the math, and assuming they pick up a little speed, we are talking about a 5 year wait from now which makes me totally nauseated!  It will be a miracle if we have our baby any sooner.  

What is so maddening about the process is that it's a roller coaster- all of which seems to be going downhill fast.  Throughout the processs we keep hearing news of encouragement- sad part is, it's unreliable.  It's really hard to be told "things are going to speed up", "the wait will be 4-6 months", "they are going to process one dossier per day" and so you're on this high, and then weeks and months pass and it doesn't happen and there is so much disappointment.  The problem I have is I want to believe all the good news.  I wish I could just count on the worst and so I would be happy with anything else, but it's difficult to do when you're praying for a miracle and waiting on a child that you know God has planned for you.  This is so hard!

A Short Film

Last year, I set a new goal to consistently put myself in situations that are not comfortable and that make me depend on God to come through. After making this goal, Isaac and I were asked to go to Sudan with e3 Partners on a mission trip, and so we signed up. As we prepared for the trip, God really used this time to draw both of us closer to Himself. While in Sudan we shared the Gospel and disciple new believers.

Part of my struggle while there was battling my insecurity and again wanting to perform perfectly in order to not fail God, but what became apparent was I was trying to do it on my own and not surrendering it to God. Come to find out, despite my imperfect delivery, he still could use it for his glory. I learned that I had to become small before God could become big.

While in Sudan, Isaac led us extremely well. Both of us were looking towards Christ for our security, love, and guidance, rather than looking at one another, and as a result we felt incredibly in-sync. God not only used this trip to bring us closer to him and one another, but he used our testimony in our marriage and in our lives to reach others.

This short film documented our experience before, during and after our trip:

http://www.e3partners.org/Page.aspx?pid=2940

It was in Africa that God began pressing upon our hearts a desire and a call to adopt a child from Africa. We had been trying to start a family for a short time, but it become obvious that God wanted us to pursue adoption. We are so thankful to Christ who has adopted us into his heavenly family, and the process of adoption to a child that is parentless is one way we can show his love on earth; however, adoption to us is more than rescuing a child from an orphanage, but it’s doing what Christ did for us. While we were sinners God sent his only Son to redeem us from our sins so that we might receive adoption as God’s sons and daughters.

I'm so grateful for our trip to Sudan!  God showed up in amazing ways and we'll never be the same...

PS.  I absolutely love the new song, "Dancing in the Minefields" that we've now linked to our blog.  I dedicate it to Isaac.  "It has been harder than we dreamed, but that's what the promise is for.... So, let's go dancing in the minefields." 

The Wait

"Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD." Psalm 27:14 (NLT)

Waiting: a virtue I aspire to obtain but often fail to achieve.

In our gotta-have-it-now culture, I have been so brain-washed into thinking there is something wrong with waiting and I shouldn't have to do it. For example, if I want to talk to my parents in Bangkok I Skype them. And if I want a new dress I order it online with a click of a button. It's no wonder I believe waiting is hard to do! I've become so productive and efficient focused that I often fail to slow down, rest, listen, and trust in God's perfect timing.

David, author of the verse above, was God's chosen king for Israel and he knew a thing or two about waiting! Scripture tell us the Spirit of God rushed over David and was with him the remainder of his days (1 Samuel 16:13). But instead of David going directly to his throne he went back to his pasture to do his job as a shepherd where the waiting began!

In his wait, God prepared David for his seat on the throne. Instead of taking the position he was promised David waited for God to move him from the pasture to the palace as he prepared him. In the wait, God made David ready for the move.

My prayer is that Isaac and I, like David, can find hope in the difficulty of waiting! I'm trying to focus on the truth that waiting in the present is beneficial to our future. I read the other day that "Waiting is less difficult and the future is brighter when we let God to do His work in our waiting season. When we let our guard and defenses down He proves Himself faithful to bring His plans for our lives to fullness.

For those of you who are curious, the Rwanda Ministry is still working on adoption #4, #6 and #8, who received approvals at the beginning of October, but they still haven't received referrals. We're approximately #138 (this hasn't been confirmed) and they've been working on #1 through #8 since January. I think it's going to be quite a wait...

Finally an Update

Yes, I’ve been absent from blogging for some time now.  I think it's the insecurity in my creative writing skills, the perfectionist in me that doesn’t want to write if it’s not perfect, the people pleaser in me that thinks what I have to say won’t be of interest to others, and my comparison nature that thinks I have to be just as funny, creative and insightful as my blogging friends that has kept me from writing recently.  (Yes, I am a believer in Jesus Christ, who struggles with all these things!)

I was on such a high after our miracle in DC!  I came back and I was just really thankful for even being in line.  It didn’t even matter to me if our dossier was in line behind a hundred or so others because we have such peace that we’re doing what God planned for us.  Plus, I had heard some hopeful rumors that I was holding onto.

Well, on Thursday September 30th I flew down to Austin for the “Together for Adoption” conference and a flood of emotions arouse.   Even before I arrived at the conference as I was talking with my Rwanda adoption friends I started to feel hit with the glum reality that our wait is likely going to be a very long time at the rate they are going.  We knew the month or so after we returned from DC would be telling of our lead time, but somehow it didn’t hit me until I arrived in Austin that several weeks had already passed and there were no good signs of the hopeful rumors that the embassy would speed up.  

On Friday at the conference they were discussing around the global orphan crisis topic and how as believers in the church we need to do something about it.  Anxious emotions started stirring.  I kept thinking, “I’m trying to do my part!  I want to be a mom to a few of the 163 million orphans!”  I think for me the problem sometimes feels like God’s timing.  However, regardless of what my flesh and Satan want to tell me, I do really need to move in God’s perfect timing! 

Since coming back from the conference I've been wrestling with anxiousness.  I've so desperately wanted for God to open up another door that may be quicker.  However, after a lot of prayer, seeking God's truth, and through some wise counsel, I'm currently feeling more clear-headed and out of the valley.

It's so crazy how one minute I can trust in God's faithfulness that he has shown me over and over, and the next I am trusting in myself!  This entire blog post reminds me of Paul's words in Romans 7:15-20:

"I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do.  And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my sinful nature.  For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out.  For what I do is not the good I want to do; no, the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it." 

 "Together for Adoption" Conference 

    

DTR!

We got a wonderful email this morning. It came at 6:56am and the title was "FedEx Shipment #863678868014 Delivered". It was great news and marks another huge event along the path towards adoption. We are now "DTR" or Dossier to Rwanda in the Rwanda adoption world lingo. The obvious questions that come to mind are, "what is next?". "how much longer?", "now what do you do?". Unfortunately we can't really answer these with any confidence at this point.

We do know that the recent events at the Ministry indicate something, we just don't know what it is at this point. It is possible that after closing temporarily for new applications that they will focus on clearing the queue. It is also possible that they will continue to focus their efforts on the Hague certification and we won't see any progress for some time. Either way our response is the same, we will continue praying for the children in the orphanage and the workers in Rwanda so that forever families can be untied with their kids as soon as possible.

I spoke with our contact in Rwanda this morning (confirming receipt of our Dossier) and was told that it will be delivered to the Ministry's offices tomorrow. Hopefully we will be able to gain some insight from this visit into what we ought to expect going forward. Over the next couple of months we should be able to develop a better idea of what lies ahead for us. As a point of reference there are several families that we know of who have had their Dossiers at the Ministry in Rwanda since October of 2009.

If we've learned anything in this experience, it is that God has a plan for us. Although there is a lot of uncertainty ahead, we are excited to find out what is next!

Tuesday in DC

On Tuesday we started our day at the Authentication Office where we met up with our great Dallas friend, Mark Jacobs.  Although we had completed this process of getting all the documents federally authenticated I was still nervous.  Any hiccup in the process could have made it impossible to get the paperwork in before the deadline, which was at the end of Tuesday's work day.  We were all cutting it close!  But all was good and we even met a new adoption couple, the Melton's, at the Authentication Office. 

We then arrived at the Embassy when it opened at 9:00am.  The goal for the day was to sit patiently until we had our dossier in hand, and so that's what we did.  And the waiting paid off.  Around 2:00pm Carol handed us our stamped dossier with the non-objection letter!   Our unpredictable, crazy journey was completed and it it was more than worth it all!

All of the families we were waiting with agreed that we were impressed with the heart of the Embassy Staff.  Despite the overwhelming nature of the situation, they were nothing but kind and understanding.  Most of all we were all encouraged to see how much each Embassy worker seemed to care about the orphans in Rwanda.  Their dedication and hard work was really inspiring. 

We told ourselves going into this adventure which began on Friday morning that we wouldn't have any expectations of the outcome.  We were just going to do what we could and we were going to let God do the rest.  If he shut a door, then we were going to accept it.  

Today we stand in awe of God's plan that was revealed every step of the way.  God opened doors, provided opportunities, and protected us (and the paperwork).   And as if that wasn't enough, he even provided amazing community of friends along the way.  It's neat to spend two days with friends who can legitimately relate to the circumstances you're in.  We were all there fighting for a child in Rwanda who we hadn't even met!     

The adoption labor pains this past week have been tough!   Even Isaac has had to come along and equally endure the hard labor pain.  But, of course, it was so worth it all.  In fact, we're glad he took us through this path.  Our faith was strengthened, our perspective changed, and we were given hope.  

We now look towards the next steps in this great adventure. We are investigating our options for moving forward and sending our docs on to Rwanda.  We have some great leads and are anxiously awaiting news from them.  In the meantime we will be finalizing the preparation of our Dossier (creating a binder and copying everything multiple times). We will also continue to pray for the Ministry and the workers as they process the adoptions ahead of us. 

With regards to timing, we truly have no idea. We have heard several promising rumors but will have to wait and see how things go over the next few weeks and months. What we can say for certain is that the developments of the past several days have changed everything. 

  

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."  Jeremiah 29:11

In front of the Embassy of Rwanda

The exterior of the Embassy of Rwanda in DC

Where we spent many hours on Monday and Tuesday

Happy hour on Monday night with our friends James and Claire who live in DC

Our new sweet friend, Vianney, who works at the Embassy

Cici and Glennon, two of our new amazing adoption friends

The incredible Embassy staff members that we interacted with the most

After Carol handed Isaac the completed Dossier

Password Protecting

Hi everyone. We really appreciate all of your support and encourgement.

Due to some privacy concerns. For the time being we are taking this blog password protected. Please feel free to contact us if you would like the password. You can contact me at isaackohlbacher@gmail.com -i

Update from DC

This morning we got up early to get all our documents federally authenticated. We were extremely nervous. They only process the documents the same day if you have less than 15 documents. We learned this last night and therefore decided to split up our documents- Isaac with 11 and myself with 12. By the grace of God, we, along with several other Rwandan adoption families, had no problems.

We then took a cab to the Rwanda embassy with our new Rwanda adoption friend, Jonathan Harper, who is from Dallas as well. We arrived right as the embassy was opening their doors. I wish you could have seen the face on the guy who opened the door. I said, "are you scared of us?" and he basically didn't reply. We just tried to be super nice and casual- we were being so careful to not overwhelm them. When we arrived we were the only two families there requesting help. Throughout the morning additional families or representatives of families showed up, probably 6 or 7 families total while we were there.

At first we were told we might get processed before tomorrow. That one word "might" was not good to hear. It was apparent they are super overwhelmed with the dossiers they need to process. The stack on the desk is a foot or two tall- and that was before the crew starting coming this morning.

I don't think they aren't processing these documents carefully- just checking through them to make sure they are legit. They won't fully process them until they are in Rwanda and it's our turn in line (which still can be 1-3 years, but who knows!).

There have been a few families that turned in their dossiers last Thursday and Friday and they are at the embassy today hoping to pick up their processed dossier.

All this to say that this is still unpredictable. But, we did just hear word from our friends who were waiting at the embassy while we grabbed lunch that the Rwanda Consular just announced to those waiting in the lobby that the dossiers that have been turned in by August 31st WILL be counted as received by the deadline and processed; however, they aren't sure when they will be able to give them back. Our hope is that we will get it back tomorrow so that we can make copies and mail it to Rwanda. But, we will come up with a plan B today.

It has been really neat meeting several other Rwanda adoption families on this journey with us. We can't thank our friends, family and strangers for praying over this situation. It's been really stressful but God has been showing up in amazing ways.

Please continue to pray- particularly for Carol, the lady at the embassy with the huge stack of dossiers to deal with. We aren't at the Embassy right now as we want to let them do their work in peace. We will continue to check in with them periodically to hear additional updates.

Friday's Whirlwind

I had another rough day on Thursday with lots of tears; However, by the end of the night Isaac and I were feeling at peace with the fact that God had closed the door to the Rwanda adoption for the time being because he had another plan- a better plan.   

Well, on Friday morning we found out that the Minister of Gender and Family Promotion in Rwanda announced that the deadline for dossiers was still August 31st, but it now would be accepted at any Rwandan embassy, not just at the Ministry in Rwanda. 

We also spoke with a family who was turning their Dossier in without the 171H approval and encouraged us to do the same.  This news changed everything for us!  We were now in the ball game again if we wanted to risk turning in our Dossier incomplete without the 171H form.

We were reluctant at first.  This had already been such an emotional journey that it was difficult wanting to jump back in this crazy adventure.  But we decided that in the end we wanted to do everything we could and not wish we would have- better safe than sorry! 

We jumped in the car with our Dossier documents (minus the 171H form) and went to Austin's Secretary of State office where we had all our documents certified.  It was an emotional journey, but by 2:00 we had everything certified and all went smoothly. 

And then, as you know from my prior blog post, in the few minutes we were home in Dallas between our Austin and Tulsa trip our 171H form was in the mail!  This was the form that we've waited on for three months and we were sure it was lost at the USCIS.  Missy asked me that morning what the chances were that the form would come in the mail and I told her less than 1% chance for all these reasons.  I mean, a total miracle this form arrived! 

So now, with the 171H form, we are still planning on flying to DC on Sunday afternoon.  On Monday morning we plan to have our documents federally certified in the morning and then deliver our completed dossier in the afternoon. 

What a day!  I'm just so amazed by God's grace and provision! 

The quickest, but best blog post ever...

We just returned from Austin where we got all our documents certified (minus the I-171H form itself, but we did get the cover sheet notarized and signed) and when we got home (which we've had 5 minutes to pack and get in the car for Tulsa for my HS reunion this weekend) we stinkin' got our I-171H form in the mail!  We're still in shock!  Off on the road again....

Rwandan Adoption Closed

We learned yesterday that the Minister of Gender and Family Promotion in Rwanda is no longer accepting new dossiers at this time for the purpose of focusing on becoming part of the Hague Convention and to focus on the  dossiers they currently have in their possession.

We were so close to turning in our dossier!  I'm a flood of emotions and in no state to blog.  I think we're needing to step back for a time and seek the Lord and His direction.

I've been reciting Matthew 11:28-30 over and over hoping that I will be able to let God take this burden so that I can rest in Him.

"Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.  Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls.  For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light."    

And I've been playing my favorite song over and over, which is hitting home right now as I'm in this valley:

Nursery Progress

Well, we sadly have had no progress on the adoption front, but we have made a little progress on the nursery.  Last week we had bamboo floors installed along with the zebra floor carpet tiles.  I'm really happy with the way it's coming together.  The light fixture for the room will go in next, then the rocker and ottoman, and then the crib.

  

We're pacing ourselves since our Rwanda adoption looks like it's going to be forever from now!  It looks like it could easily be 2 to 3 years until we bring our baby home.  In the meantime we're exploring other options to pursue while waiting on our Rwandan baby.  

Isaac has been calling consistently to the USCIS checking in on our I-600A (the form that we submit) and the I-171H (which is the form that we are waiting on in return).  He's left a number of messages to our assigned lady, but we've never received a call back.  He's also spoken with a handful of different customer service people and not one has been able to find our I-600A!  They just put in a request to find it and that's that.  This week Isaac finally requested that a supervisor call him and basically she told him that she didn't know where our paperwork was and to not call back.  Our information isn't in the computer system and therefore it's in one of the many boxes sitting in the file room that have come from all over the US.  Once they find it, they said it would only take 5 minutes to approve it, but the key is in trying to find it.  We know of at least two couples who have been lucky and gotten their I-171H form back in 11 days- incredible!

It sounds like it's going to be an act of God if we ever get this form so that we can move on with our adoption and get in line at the Rwandan embassy behind a hundred or so dossiers that are taking a long, long time to process!    

I'm struggling with not pitying our situation, but God has been so faithful.  One way he's been showing up is in the people he's been putting in our lives.  Even just having lunch with two of my great girlfriends, Vanessa and Brooke, was so refreshing.  Then, in the gym a girl named Lauren, who recognized me from an adoption class at our church, was such an encouragement to me!  Also, our adoption friends Marc and Kayan from Austin came and stayed with us last night- that was, of course, so fun and refreshing! 

Until we hear anything further, we'll be praying for the USCIS, they seem so overwhelmed with the new centralized processing implementation. 

Expectations

So while in Austin last week I started to finally process the numbers and they didn’t make any sense.  Through the grapevine we’ve heard there are currently 90 dossiers in Rwanda waiting to be processed (this information was not from AWAA).  We, sadly, are still waiting on our I-171H form until we can complete our dossier, so we’re not even in that numbered line yet!   Historically we've seen that 17 adoptions were completed in 2008, 16 in 2009, and only six thus far in 2010.  Given the large number already waiting ahead of us would suggest a much longer time frame than we're being advised which is now nine to eleven months.  That lead time is from the DTR (Dossier to Rwanda) until our Referral (which is when they email you with an assigned child).  I heard this new lead time for the first time yesterday because I missed the last conference call when they announced it.   Before yesterday I was thinking the lead time was six to nine months and when we started the program we thought it was four to six months.

Up until this point I wanted to believe and trust AWAA that their prediction was accurate.  I wanted to believe that the numbers I was putting together weren’t right and that AWAA knew something that I didn’t.  So when I heard this new time frame yesterday I didn’t like what I was being told.   Now, I had double bad news- I had to wait a long time (the agencies prediction) or possibly even a longer time (my prediction based on numbers).   Yesterday I was reminded  by the agency that we’ve been told  from the beginning of the process that these are only predictions and with international adoption, and also with being a new program, there will undoubtedly be bumps along the way, delays, and frustrations.  

I want to have accurate expectations of the process and trust God fully, but yesterday I hit a wall and felt so frustrated and depressed.   I’m disappointed- and there is no denying that!   I just had to let myself grieve yesterday.  There is nothing I can do at this point except to seek and trust Christ, but I’m going to need his help.

"Three different times I begged the Lord to take it away.  Each time he said, “My grace is all you need. My power works best in weakness.” So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ can work through me. That’s why I take pleasure in my weaknesses, and in the insults, hardships, persecutions, and troubles that I suffer for Christ. For when I am weak, then I am strong." ~2 Corinthians 12: 8-10

     

Austin

I had an amazing five days in Austin last week! My best friend, Missy, and I drove to Austin on Wednesday to prepare for the Seed Effect fundraiser on Thursday. God showed up in some amazing ways! Here were some of the highlights:

1. Missy and I had breakfast with Kayan, who is a great adoption friend. I'm super grateful for her friendship, wisdom, and support!

2. God revealed himself through Esmeralda- It was truly a God moment! Read the story on Missy's blog

3. Seed Effect had a fabulous event with over 50 people in attendance!

4. I reconnected with my cousin, JW, who I hadn't seen in over four years!

5. God spoke to me so clearly with Romans 14. If I'm being totally transparent, I've been really struggling with judgement on people having biological children verses adopting. But when I came across Romans 14 it was such an "ah-ha" moment!

6. I met the neatest people in Austin- so many incredible mission-minded people!

7. Chilled at the lake with new and old wonderful friends!

40 Days

It has been 40 days since Tara and I completed our fingerprint appointments for the USCIS 171h approval. We had really hoped/planned to have our Dossier already on its way to Washington by now. Throughout the entire process of adoption I am constantly reminded of my weaknesses. There is no control during adoption, there is no logic or reason, there is no efficiency, there is nothing easy. There is only faith and hope.

On this fortieth day of waiting I'm reminded of the many examples of 'after 40 days' in the Bible. How must Jesus have felt after 40 days of fasting? What about Noah after 40 days inside the darkness of the ark? What kind of frustration did the Israelites army experience after 40 days of taunting from Goliath? What can I learn from this most recent 'after 40 days' in my life?



I spoke with the new national benefits center (really you just get to talk with one of a few different call center people) once again this morning. No new news from them, our file is still in Missouri and still hasn't been assigned an agent to look at it. I've become concerned that our health documents are going to be too old once we get the ball rolling again. Following the blogs of couples going through the same adoption process can be both very supportive but also at times challenging. Yesterday we learned that another couple (the Vanderpool's) who are near us in the process were fortunate to receive their approval only 11 days after completing their fingerprint appointment. Hoping we'll hear something soon.

What's in a "Dossier"?

Here is a list of what is required for our “dossier” in case you were curious:

· Home Study (certified)
· Application Letter (certified)
· Declaration of Intent Letter- Husband (certified)
· Declaration of Intent Letter-Wife (certified)
· Family Composition Letter (certified)
· Copy of Passport-Husband (certified)
· Copy of Passport-Wife (certified)
· Marriage Certificate (certified)
· Birth Certificate- Husband (certified)
· Birth Certificate- Wife (certified)
· Wage & Tax Statement (W2) (certified)
· Financial Statement (certified)
· Police Report- Husband (certified)
· Police Report- Wife (certified)
· Proof of Medical Insurance (certified)
· Medical Form (< 2 Months Old)- Husband (certified)
· Medical Form (< 2 Months Old)- Wife (certified)
· Guardianship Letter (certified)
· Power of Attorney Form (certified)
· USCIS I-171H Approval (certified)
· Family Photo Pages*

*2 full-faced photos of the two of us, 4 photos reflecting our life, 1 photo of the outside of our home, and 1 photo of the inside of our home

All the documents have to be originals with exception of the I-171H, proof of health insurance, passport copies, and the W2/tax forms which are notarized under a “Notarized Copy of an Original” form.

We have to mail in two copies of everything listed above which is our full dossier. Lastly, we will include once copy of our Hague Certificates (online training course) and our Agency Post Placement Agreement.

Once we submit our dossier to our agency, America World, this is what happens:

1. Dossier receives two staff checks.

2. Dossier is taken to the State Department and the Rwandan Embassy for additional authentication.

3. Dossier is sent to Rwanda with 2-4 weeks of arriving at AWAA.

a. The DTR (Dossier to Rwanda) date will be disclosed to families with an email from a family coordinator that includes a Fed Ex tracking # for the dossier's journey to Rwanda.

b. Our wait begins! Right now our agency is estimating this will be 7-9 months. (When we started in January it was only 4-6 months from this point.)

These are just some of the pictures we included in our family photo pages:

Us in Kajo Keji, Sudan for a mission trip (November 2009)

Us with Isaac’s Grandparents, his cousin Kyle and Kyle’s wife, Kendall, in Houston (December 2009)

Tara’s Family: (Left to Right) Chase and Erica Healey, Us, Caitlin Walthall,

Claudia and Gary Walthall after church (Christmas 2009)

Isaac with some friends: baby Smith, Charlie, Shelby and Jason, after breakfast in Tulsa, OK (April 2010)

Tara with her best friend, Missy, at a party in Missy’s home (January 2010)

Nursery Painting Complete!

Grandpa Gary, also known as Papou (which means grandpa in Greek), gave us the best gift ever by painting baby Kohlbacher's room!   After three days of my dad's blood (really just lots of blood flowing), sweat (this was no easy task), and tears (the tears actually came from me out of thankfulness)... the painting is completed and I absolutely love it!  We couldn't be more thankful to my dad for his labor of love!  

The next step on the nursery is figuring out the floors.  The next step on the adoption front is still waiting on our dumb form from the USCIS before we can get all our documents certified in Austin.  At that point we'll be completed with our dossier and from there we'll wait approximately 7 to 9 months.    

Nursery Sneak Peek

My sweet, sweet dad is in town painting our nursery for us.  After one of three days it's looking fabulous!  Of course, I have a "complicated order" (watch Bon Qui Qui on You Tube if you haven't already- hilarious)!   

He's painting...

• white on the walls and ceiling,
• black chalkboard paint on one wall, 
• white on the all the trim including the shutters, baseboards, doors and the woodwork inside the closet and 
• 7" yellow stripes on the ceiling.  

I know, can you believe?  Many, many thanks to my sweet, sweet dad and all his work!

Here is a small sneak peek into what's to come after the painting is complete:

Crib Bedding Fabric + Glider and Ottoman Fabric + 

Carpet FLOR Tiles

   

A Special Cool Thursday

One of our favorite things to do is attend "Cool Thursdays", a concert series on Thursday nights at the Dallas Arboretum.  This week my parents came with us and we had an absolute blast!  We had perfect seats with a great view and a nice breeze, and "Le Freak", the disco band for the night, was so entertaining!

But the highlight of the night was the adorable African girl in the crowd.  She is approximately 7-8 years old and she and two other white girlfriends around her age were dancing with the crowd near the stage.  We could not keep our eyes off that adorable girl!   She had the cutest dance moves, cutest hair, cutest... everything!  I think all four of us weren't just watching her intently because she was cute, but also it was a visual of what our child could look like physically and also how our black child would adjust, fit-in, and look in a white environment.

As we were watching/stalking her she made her way up to the front of the stage.  She stretched her arm out really stiff towards the singer who was scanning the crowd and every once in a while slapping people's hands in a high-five.  She waited for a few minutes really patiently- not waving it, just keeping it really straight with her fingers all together and alternating arms when one got tired.  Finally the singer in the middle of his up-beat disco song grasped on to her hand and held it for a few seconds.  When he let go she looked to her friends with her mouth open and started jumping up and down- she was so happy!  The minute he held her hand I unexpectedly started crying.  I couldn't believe I was crying, but I look to my left and my mom is also crying! ... And we can't stop!  My mom can barely talk because she can't get herself together, but she articulated for us that it was so symbolic of our precious African child with outstretched arms just patiently waiting for us.

Well, after that incident we tried to keep our eyes off of her because we couldn't do so without crying again.  At the end of the night we briefly met the girl's mom who informed us she adopted her from Ethiopia.  It was such a neat encouragement that other families in our community have/are adopting from Africa- I love that!

We're certain it was by NO mistake that girl was in front of us at Cool Thursday- that was God!  

 

Changes at the USCIS

So as we're getting ready for the long holiday weekend another week has passed without much progress (at least as far as we can tell). I spoke with the nice people at the USCIS on Tuesday (877.424.8374) and got a better idea about what timeline we're on. We received notice of receipt for our I-600A on June 7th, but due to some structural changes for the processing of these forms we're once again delayed. They are consolidating the process into one central processing facility from the regional centers located around the country. The new operations will be out of Missouri (where the guy I spoke with was located). I was told that our documents were still in Dallas, but his system showed that they were due to be mailed on July 1st (yesterday). I am going to call again on Tuesday to check on the status. We had hoped that we might receive our I-171h by this week, but it looks like we're at least another couple weeks out. Hopefully once our stuff gets to Missouri the process goes quickly. We're ready to get the Dossier on its way!

Making Room for Baby

On Sunday my mom and I starting making room for baby!  We disassembled the bed, moved the lamps to the other guest room, and cleared the closet.  Finding a new home for every thing (out of season clothes, blankets, accessories, etc.) wasn't a quick task, but it feels so good to have started the nursery project!  This was the guest room before today:  

The bed and side tables are being hauled to my sister's college apartment today so we're all cleared out to start the nursery.  I'm in the beginning stages of pulling together all the parts of the nursery- the crib, rocker & ottoman, paint, light fixture, bedding, and carpet.  Here is  my inspiration pic:

Different, huh?  From toile to contemporary!  

We're selling all the custom black and cream toile pieces- queen coverlet, canopy and drapes for $575 (valued at $2,500).  All the pieces are in perfect condition.  If you're interested contact me at TaraKohlbacher@gmail.com.  I'd be happy to answer any questions, give you specific measurements, or email you more detailed pictures.